Heart-Shaped Box

It’s Valentine’s Day. Can you feel the love?

Flowers, candy, chocolates, cards, plush teddy bears, semi-automatic handguns, and racy lingerie—this holiday has it all. Of course, I always plan well in advance to avoid scouring the grocery store at the last minute.

I’ve seen many desperate men search pillaged shelves amidst floral remnants of vanquished bouquets. Sometimes I wish I could help, but it’s every man for himself. You might get away with a homemade card or a fancy dinner. Just don’t be surprised when you return home empty-handed and find no one there.

Some couples might not celebrate Valentine’s Day at all. Perhaps they’re turned off by another commercialized holiday centered around greeting cards. If there were a more powerful lobby than Big Candy, Big Flower, and Hallmark, I wouldn’t know it. They’ve got a stranglehold over this country every February 14th.

But there’s more to Valentine’s Day than candy hearts and roses. Cupid, the god of love, derived from Greek mythology. Saint Valentine, as we all know, derived from Christian martyrs in early Rome. Add all those things together, and you get a holiday of candy and flowers. It couldn’t be any clearer.

Friday I’m in Love

I wasn’t always the suave, romantic heartthrob I appear to be today. In my youth, I was a bit of a hopeless romantic. It was the late ’90s, before social media and smartphones. I was bagging groceries at Winn-Dixie and feeling sorry for myself around Valentine’s Day. The world was against me.

Like any self-pitying teenager, I longed for companionship, but self-inflicted sabotage was all I knew. I witnessed an endless barrage of people buying flowers and candy as love songs played throughout the store.

The holiday was for couples to show off their lives of perpetual bliss. Single people needn’t apply. I hated everything about it.

“Curse this day and these stupid songs!” I lamented.

At fifteen years old, I was determined to be single forever and die alone. Such a melodramatic outlook resulted from, among other things, the indie rock, new wave, and industrial music I consumed daily. Maybe it was a generational thing.

Nothing Compares 2 U

I didn’t fare much better in adulthood, but at least I understood I was no different than anyone else. Everyone faces struggles and hardships. The most you can do is not let it define you.

I’ve learned a lot from my mistakes, but the self-pitying, quick-tempered juvenile of decades past is never too far from my mind. Inner conflict keeps us on our toes.

I’m fortunate to have made it this far and equally indebted to my wife of three years. For most of our lives, we didn’t know each other. Now I can’t imagine life without her.

Valentine’s Day can mean different things to different people, depending on their circumstances. For me, it represents a time to acknowledge the people we care about. And you don’t even need a greeting card for that.